My Children Lack a Filter

I definitely am an advocate for honesty. I have always strived to teach my children to be honest. Sometimes though, they are brutal and unwarranted in their honesty. I thought it would be fun to share some of the things they have said lately.

1. On the way to the doctor’s office.

Monkey (2 going on 14): “Mommy, I’m so excited to see the baby!”

Me: “What baby?”

Monkey: “at the doctor appointment..”

Me: “uh, no….no more babies. I’m just getting my blood taken”

Monkey: “okay.”


Sitting at the doctor’s office waiting to be called back. Monkey was watching videos on my phone, she got down out of her chair, and stood by my leg.

Monkey: “Mommy what’s THAT smell?!”

Me: “I don’t smell anything. What does it smell like?”

Monkey: “Smells like poop!!!”

Me: laughing “I don’t smell poop, did you poop your pants?”

Monkey: “No…I think it’s you!”

Me: laughing “oh thank you, but I did not poop or fart. Are you sure you didn’t poop?”

Monkey: “no, I didn’t. It’s still dry.”

Then goes back to watching videos.🤨😂

Still unsure what she was smelling.


Pickle (he is 6) and I were enjoying some lunch together while Monkey was with Meena (my mom) for the day. He begins talking about us having another baby.

Pickle: “Well if we had another baby it would be a girl.”

Me: “No, we aren’t having anymore babies. We can’t have anymore. 3 is enough for us.”

Pickle: “No. Two is enough.”

Me: “oh yeah? Then which one of you should we get rid of?”

Pickle: “hmmmmm. Monkey!”

Me: “Awe, why do you say that?”

Pickle: “Because she always ruins my stuff!!”

Me: “You both ruin each other’s stuff all the time and it won’t be long before Bug does the same! I think you would miss her. I would miss her.”

Pickle: “Why?”

Me: “because I love her just like I love you. I couldn’t get rid of any of you.”

Pickle: “oh….”


We have been doing potty training with Monkey. She is mostly using the toilet, but some days she is lazy.

Monkey: “mommy….”

Me putting away laundry: “hmm?”

Monkey: “it’s still dry, its still dry..”

Me: “Are you sure? Did you pee or poop?

Monkey: “uggggghhh!!! No!”

She has done this before where when she actually goes in her pants and she will tell us she is still dry. So I know usually that means she had an accident.

Me: “okay let me check..”

Monkey: “no!! Ughhhhhhh!!!” [She does this growl thing lately.]

I chase her down the hallway and check her. She did poop.

She starts laughing.

Me: “I don’t think it’s funny..”

Monkey: “Yeah! Just a little bit!”



Monkey has been talking a lot about body parts lately. She was going potty…

Monkey: “Where is my penis?”

Me: “You don’t have a penis. You have a vagina.”

Monkey: “Boys have penis? I’m a boy.”

Me: “Are you?”

Monkey: “no..”

Me: “Are you a girl?”

Monkey: “No..I’m just Monkey.”

Me: “Okay, that works for me!”

Monkey: “You have a penis.”

Me: “No. I don’t.”


About a week after getting home from the hospital after having Bug. I was in my room in a sports bra and pajama pants and Pickle came in.

Pickle: “Mommy…”

Me: “yeah?”

Pickle: “Your belly is still big. Is there another baby in there?”

Me: “No. It takes time for a belly to go back down. And, I have never really been skinny. Not since I was about your age…”

Pickle: “oh.. well it’s still big…”

Me: “I know. Thank you.”

7. We went to the store and I had just started my first period since having Bug. Monkey had to go too so we went in together. She pees and then it was my turn.

Monkey: “You have red poop in your pants!”

Me: laughing “no, that is blood.”




My mom was changing Bug on the couch and Monkey walked up to her.

Monkey: “Meena, that is his balls!”


These kids crack me up! I love seeing their unique personalities coming to light as they get older. I wish I could catch it all on camera, but that sounds like a lot of work and storage space needed.

What funny things have you heard kids say lately? Let me know in the comments! Also, you should follow meon Instagram for pictures and videos!



Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.

%d bloggers like this:
close-alt close collapse comment ellipsis expand gallery heart lock menu next pinned previous reply search share star